Tag Archives: Marriage

Review: Same As It Ever Was

Same As It Ever Was

Same As It Ever Was
By Claire Lombardo
Doubleday Books, 9780385549554, June 2024, 512pp.

The Short of It:

One of the most frustratingly, endearing reads I’ve ever read.

The Rest of It:

Let me explain that sentence above. Julia Ames walks us through her life as a married mother of two. She includes it all, the doubts, the flaws, the insecurities. We meet her as a young woman, and then a married woman and then a mom. We are taken back and forth in time to when it was good, and when it wasn’t great. And how a brief slip of common sense sends her down a disastrous path. But does it?

It took me a really long time to read Same as it Ever Was. The back and forth nature of the storytelling is necessary but also a bit exhausting. Julia is a frustrating character. She second-guesses too much. There is a lot of internal dialogue as she navigates life and basically, everyday interactions. Sometimes I wanted to shake her and tell her to be more confident but then other times, you just want to give her a hug because she is the definition of a hot mess.

Julia is deeply flawed but also relatable. Her flashbacks of raising her children reminded me of my own experiences raising tiny humans. The overall not-knowing if what you are doing is right, or if you could be doing it better. Her relationship with her husband Mark, is tenuous at best. So there’s not a lot of encouragement going on there.

What is the story about? LIFE. It’s about leaving your single self to become part of something larger. It’s about all the missteps you take as you figure out the kind of life you want to live. It’s about mistakes, forgiveness, and the people who come into your life to help you navigate the ups and downs.

Lombardo’s writing is clear and authentic. Genuine, you could say. As I was reading, there were a million moments where I caught myself saying, “I get it.” Especially the sections about Julia’s adult children and their evolution from sweet toddlerhood to moody teens. It all made me a little sad though, that empty nest thing and the “what’s next?” aspect of  life. Life is a series of next steps and this story is entirely that.

As you get towards the end of the story,  there is a lot going on, so many feelings as Julia figures out how to interact with her very difficult mother, I mean, who can’t relate to that? But the awkwardness and sarcasm hits you before the sense of loneliness and loss does. This section felt a little long. Perhaps, because it was uncomfortable.

This is not a story you will love. It’s not that kind of story but it’s a story you will appreciate, no matter what stage of life you are currently in.

Source: Borrowed
Disclosure: This post contains Indiebound affiliate links.

Review: Honor

Honor

Honor
By Thrity Umrigar
Algonquin Books,9781643753300, 2022, 352 pp.

The Short of It:

Weighty.

The Rest of It:

In Honor, Indian American journalist Smita has returned to India to cover a story, but reluctantly: long ago she and her family left the country with no intention of ever coming back. As she follows the case of Meena–a Hindu woman attacked by members of her own village and her own family for marrying a Muslim man–Smita comes face to face with a society where tradition carries more weight than one’s own heart, and a story that threatens to unearth the painful secrets of Smita’s own past. ~Indiebound

I was immediately pulled into this story. Meena’s story of abuse at the hands of her own brothers, was intense in the telling. Permanently disfigured by fire and ridiculed by the entire village for falling in love and marrying a Muslim man, proved to be too much for her to overcome. As unwelcome as she is, her young daughter, Abra is what keeps her there. Forced to live with a MIL who hates her for what happened to her son, the only thing that grounds her are the ethereal visits of her husband Abdul as he makes his presence known through dreams.

Smita, a journalist, returns to India to assist a colleague who is having hip surgery. Her entire motivation for going is to just help her colleague during recovery. India is not a place she ever wanted to return to. Too many memories of when her family was forced to leave when she was a child. But when she arrives, she finds out that Shannon wants her to pick up Meena’s story. That her time in India will not be spent navigating recovery, but interviewing Meena, the MIL, the brothers that caused her so much pain. This was not in the cards, but how can such a story go untold?

Smita’s time in India is wrought with unpleasant memories, difficult people, and reluctant witnesses. Her only saving grace is the man who Shannon brought in to help navigate the language barrier. Mohan’s kindness, common sense and loyalty to Smita and Shannon prove to be invaluable.

This was an easy story to fall into given the weighty subject matter but the ending! No spoilers but I was not prepared for the ending. It was like a slap to the face! Overall, to say that I “enjoyed” this story would be a real stretch but I found myself taken by the characters and the difficulty presenting itself as Meena’s story is told. It was chosen for my book club and I think there will be plenty to discuss.

Source: Borrowed
Disclosure: This post contains Indiebound affiliate links.