Tag Archives: Aging

Review: Being Mortal

Being Mortal

Being Mortal
By Atul Gawande
Picador USA, 9781250076229, September 2017, 304pp.

The Short of It:

Well written and thought-provoking. If you’ve never thought about losing your independence while battling a long-term/terminal illness, then this will be an eye-opener for you.

The Rest of It:

Atul Gawande was born into a family of doctors. As a doctor and  himself, he became interested in palliative care and how a shift in the care of the terminally ill, can prolong their quality of life. Not cure them, of course, but provide them care by fulfilling such wishes as more time with the family, continuing to teach music, eating ice cream and watching football in the comfort of your own home.

When his own father is diagnosed with cancer, his research in this area becomes personal. How do you treat a patient in this situation? How do you secure a comfortable environment while controlling pain, seeing to their psychological needs and their desire to maintain quality of life?

This was a fascinating read. Gawande discusses the issues with nursing homes and hospice care and points out two very important questions that should be asked of any patient with a terminal illness.

  1. What is your understanding of what you’ve been told?
  2. What is your expectation as far as care?

So often, these critical questions are never asked. It’s assumed that people want to be cured but often, they just want to be pain-free, comfortable and independent. That last part being a huge issue for most. This is a heavy topic but Gawande does a beautiful job highlighting what CAN be done for a positive outcome.

If this topic interests you, get yourself a copy and if you have a chance. Check out his Ted Talk too.

Source: Borrowed
Disclosure: This post contains Indiebound affiliate links.

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Review: Please Look After Mom

Please Look After Mom

Please Look After Mom
By Kyung-Sook Shin
Vintage, Paperback, 9780307739513, April 2012, 272pp.

The Short of It:

The sacrifices that a mother makes for her children and husband are not fully realized until she goes missing.

The Rest of It:

Sometimes you read a book and it stays with you for a very long time. Please Look After Mom is one such book.

Sixty-nine year old So-nyo is with her husband at a Seoul rail station when they become separated from each other. Suddenly, days have passed and she has not been found. As the family gathers to post flyers, each of them find themselves questioning the life she’s lived and the sacrifices she’s made. As their search continues and the days pass without any news, they discover things about their mother that they never knew and it dawns on them that the severe headaches she complained of and the lapses in memory were perhaps more serious than she let on.

This book hit me hard. As a daughter, I just kept thinking of my own mom who passed away late last year and how so many things were left unsaid between us. Mental illness and addiction took center stage and I was left to dream about a mother I could never have. But then you look at this book from a mother’s perspective and you can certainly see why she did the things that she did. I’m telling you, this book grabbed me from all directions and it nearly caused me to “ugly cry” and that’s saying a lot.

Parts of the story are told using a second person point of view which always throws me off. Once I got used to it and how it was used to tell the story, it just felt right for the author to share the story that way. There’s an intimacy to it that leaves you feeling a little uncomfortable, which in this case wasn’t necessarily a bad feeling. It just really got me thinking about mothers, children, marriage and everything in between.

I can’t even adequately tell you how this book made me feel because it affected me on so many levels but it was a really good read and very different from what I’ve been reading lately. I’m so glad my book club chose it for our May meeting. Looking forward to the discussion.

Source: Borrowed
Disclosure: This post contains Indiebound affiliate links.