Category Archives: Life

Jerk Update

A few days ago, I spouted off about something that happened to my son and so many of you took the time to comment or talk to me about it via Facebook (thank you). I can’t say that I am feeling much better, but here’s what happened.

After my email to the head coach, I received an email reply the next day. The email was delicately worded, but more concerned with my husband’s reaction to the coach in question, than the issue at hand. You see, after my blog post, my husband decided to talk to Coach Jerk and it was not pretty. Needless to say, Coach Jerk morphed into even more of a jerk, which I didn’t think was possible. The head coach’s email stated the following:

*That my son was not kicked off the team.

*That my son never indicated that he was having problems with his health.

*That my son was disrespectful and mouthed off to the coaches.

Not true. When I read that email, I almost lost it but at the bottom of the email, was the head coach’s number so I called him. After a very long talk, he admitted that out of the three coaches, the third coach did not witness any disrespect and that he even stated that my son was “not that kind if kid.”

We talked for a very long time. What started off as a very firm email of support for his coaches, turned into a misunderstanding for all parties involved. I am not 100% okay with it although I do think there was a misunderstanding in that the Jerk took my son’s pain as a sign of rebellion. What I did get out of it, is that the head coach is essentially a good guy and was trying to see both sides of it without putting any one party down in the process.

End Result:

My son was invited back, but we chose to keep him out for the following reasons:

*The collusion between the two coaches is unacceptable. I don’t want my kid around people who are willing to back each other up when they KNOW they are in the wrong. The “good ole boy” club is alive and well and I want no part of it. I pretty much told him so.

*Even if all parties agree to start over, I don’t think my son would make it through the season with Coach Jerk riding him every time he had a problem.

I did not get a dime back because my son was invited to return. I was really very close to taking it higher, but the head coach suggested that my son try again next year, under a different coach. If he does come back, I don’t want him to get blacklisted because his mother took it all the way up. Know what I mean?

And even though I feel as if we got the short end of the stick in this, I do think that the head coach is going to keep an eye on Coach Jerk. In fact, I am positive he will. This guy is a loose cannon. Unhappy in life and taking it out on these kids. It will come to a head, and this jerk will get his. Of that, I am sure. It would be good to nip it now, but when you have coaches backing up other coaches, it’s difficult to do unless the kids come forward. Some of the kids offered to quit, but my son told them not to. So there you have it.

My son has been very depressed since it happened. I thought that signing him up for the next show (The Music Man) would improve his spirits but he’s dragging himself around like a sack of laundry. One funny thing to note…I just found out that his cross-country coach was an old teacher of mine from high school! Can you believe it? Funny and nice. At least with that sport, I know he’ll be respected by his coaches. A little bit of light during this dark time.

If I didn’t have to think about grudges and repercussions, I would have reamed Coach Jerk  in every way possible so this is an unusual position to be in. I’m a little depressed over it myself and so close to just taking it to the top anyway, but I am trying to put a little distance between it and myself. I just feel badly for my son. Now, he can’t play and it sucks.

The Jerk Store

I am a huge fan of Seinfeld and there is this one episode where George strives for witty comebacks and in his attempt to do so, he comes up with this.

Well, I certainly wanted to use that line on The Boy’s basketball coach the other night ’cause this guy tossed my kid out of basketball camp. Awhile back, I mentioned that my son had some issues with the growth of his chest. I didn’t go into detail, just mentioned it and said that he might have to have surgery down the line because his sternum is growing ahead of him. Anyway, he can play sports, but repetitive use of muscles anywhere near his chest, creates inflammation yada yada. So he can’t do hundreds of push-ups. You get the idea. He has a doctor’s note and it’s all in his file.

All of his other coaches work around it. Not a problem and as long as it doesn’t get inflamed, he can do anything else and it doesn’t affect the game. But, his chest was hurting the other night and he was working through it, but clutched his chest a few times. Somehow, this jerk took that as a sign of rebellion and tossed him out! Told him not to come back. Ever.

Funny. He’s a student leader. All of his teachers have nothing but good things to say about him yet all of a sudden he has an attitude that warrants his removal from the facility?? I don’t think so.

I get that this is high school. That things are handled differently. I get that he missed practice because of the DC trip (which was approved and scheduled months before we even knew when camp was). I also get that he missed practice for production week (the play) but hello, the camp is OPTIONAL and not a requirement for the team. Additionally, it states right on the packet, that vacations can be taken. This guy clearly had it in for him because of the missed practices. That, or he’s the type of guy that would laugh at a kid in a wheelchair. Wouldn’t surprise me.

I won’t even mention that they changed the camp times from morning to evening which basically conflicted with everything the kid is doing (cross country, the play, Associated Student Body). Okay, I guess I just mentioned it didn’t I?

How would you guys handle it? I sent an email to the head coach (who was not there) stating the facts. Truthfully, The Boy won’t be playing even if they decide to let him. I don’t want him around that idiot. I asked that they transfer all of the money he raised for the team to cross country, but I’m sure that won’t fly either. What can be done at this point?

Right now, calling him a jerk feels good so I’ll just keep doing it.

Jerk.