We Are All Completely Beside Ourselves
By Karen Joy Fowler
G.P. Putnam’s Sons, 2014, 336pp.

The Short of It:

A powerful exploration of a non-traditional family and the impact that one decision has on their lives.

The Rest of It:

The story opens in the middle. This is how Rosemary decides to tell it; for reasons that are explained later. The Cookes are like any other family. A mother and father, a son and two daughters. Except that Rosemary’s dad is a psychologist conducting an experiment in his own home. Young Rosemary loves having the grad students around, documenting their every move. Their comings and goings become part of the lives. Academia, and such.

With the story opening in the middle, Fern, Rosemary’s sister has already been sent away. Losing her sister at such a young age and not really understanding why Fern was sent away leaves Rosemary unsettled. Whereas her older brother Lowell, becomes angry. Very angry. So angry that he eventually leaves home without a word.

As an adult, Rosemary befriends other wayward souls while Lowell remains an unknown, somewhere out in the world doing God knows what. There are glimmers of his existence but Rosemary’s family falls into a deep depression and Rosemary begins to revisit those early years with the grad students. Why was Fern sent away? What role did Rosemary play in it?

I am intentionally not giving you information. This is a book that needs to be experienced. I read a New York Times article about books that stay with you, and this book from 2014 was listed. I had never heard of it but was immediately intrigued. The reporter said to go into it cold. I tried.

It’s a devastating read but when you really dig in, it’s hopeful. Karen Joy Fowler does not consider herself to be an “activist” but in an interview she once said that she considers herself to be a literary advocate who uses her writing to promote awareness of a given cause.

Rosemary’s loss is so palpable. She not only lost her sister Fern, but really her brother Lowell too and a piece of each of her parents. A piece that neither of them seem to know how to get back. Disappointment abounds. But does it?

I chose this book for book club and we had a really good discussion about it. Fowler found her inspiration from two real-life experiments, The Kellogg Experiment and Project Nim. Click on those links if you don’t mind knowing the big reveal.

This is a heart-felt read. There’s much to say about family, science and what is means to be human. Highly recommend.

Source: Borrowed
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